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14 April 2008
51. Reasons to Tug and Bite
Was there something outside of my window as I slept? Or was that just a dream?
There is some dim recollection of that night that consists of a light outside of the closed window with the closed curtains. Not a streetlight because the light moved slowly across the window. If it did occur then I wonder if the astronaut is possible outside of Mordan House. I think I had assumed that it was only apparent in the house and its grounds. But then my mind tells me that the dead astronaut is an apparition only of me and how I’m feeling and what I’ve been through. When I encounter this thought then I wonder what it matters that the apparition occurred outside of Mordan House! Why then should it not occur wherever my mind happens to be? But then I go full circle and I wonder what it would mean if the phenomenon happened to be real? There is nothing that I’ve uncovered that leads me to think that it’s real. My investigations yesterday revealed nothing that begins to prove it – in fact, they all lean towards disproving the idea!
Here are some of the things that Mrs Ormsley didn’t say to me over breakfast. She didn’t say anything about me sleeping in my car again. She didn’t ask me why I sometimes sleep there. She didn’t mention James. She didn’t mention that he was away and that she had tried to tell me as I left the library. She didn’t ask me what I was doing at Mordan House. She didn’t try to weasel anything out of me. And she didn’t try to put me down.
The last thing she said as she walked me to the front door after breakfast was: “Come back anytime you want. My door’s always open to you. If you see the light on, just knock.”
The last thing I said to her as I walked out the door was: “Well, if the ghost of the dead astronaut appears above the trees at Mordan House again then I may just be back!”
It was only after she closed the door that I realised what I’d said. Although I couldn’t see her, I could feel her, behind the closed door, pondering what I had said – I could feel the exclamation mark of her as tall as Godzilla, I could feel her again devouring my reputation like King Kong might devour a giant banana when it encountered it terrorising New York. For my part, all I could do was stand there for a second with my teeth feasting on my bottom lip. And when I returned to my car I gave my hair a tug so sharp that I felt the sting of it for miles.
Here are some of the things that Kidman didn’t ask me when I got back to Mordan House. She didn’t ask me where I’d been all night. She didn’t ask me what I had done with my previous day. She didn’t ask me what I was planning to do next. Just as well: I wasn’t sure myself. But then I found myself getting changed and setting off for the library again, to continue my investigations.
The last thing she said to me as I left the house was: “I’m going to have a nice surprise for you when you come back later, my lovely little untitled friend.”
‘Going’ – at least she’d dropped saying ‘gonnae’ and ‘dinnae’ and all of that! As I thought of this, the last thing I said to her as I closed the front door was: “That sounds nice, but I may decide to stay at Mrs Ormsley’s again. I’ll see how I feel.”
It was only as I moved towards the car that I realised what I’d said. I could almost hear Kidman’s internal scream of “That bitch Ormsley?” weakening the hinges of the door.
It was just before I reached the town that the stinging sensation across my scalp finally subsided and I let my bottom lip alone. I didn’t even think what Kidman’s surprise might be.
Want to read more? Read the whole story by clicking on the first blog called Prelude and start clicking forwards using the tabs above the title.
19:05 Posted in Part Two: Getting Some Answers | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this | Tags: haunted house, ghost story, horror story, astronaut, space, nicole kidman, journal